Tuesday, 7 September 2010


Blimey I'm tired of late, sleepy tired. Even though some colleagues and I have got a bit of a car share going on to get to work it's a long day going into Lerwick, working with young adults all day and then getting home to carry one with the rest that is part of one's life.

Been driven back from Lerwick I'm tired, yawning; playing with Beren at home my eye's are going and talking seems a struggle; tea is in the oven and suddenly I'm woken up to eat it; putting Beren to bed I dream I'm taking him to bed and nearly falling asleep, only to wake up confused in his room and hour or so after I took him to bed!

Today has been a sleepy day!

And talk of it reminds me of Squeeky, my long lost teddy bear.

This isn't him, he was whiter, less refined and had no fur on his tummy from me squeaking him. We separated 33 years ago when I was asleep getting my tonsils out in hospital, but I still remember him. I wind my Mam up about my loss but I got over it, honest!

Turning on the radio this morning I was also reminded of my past. More talk of a retro-virus linked to Chronic Fatigue Syndrone/ME. In the past it would have had me caught in a whirl wind of need to  know, devouring the internet looking for it's meaning, trying to glean a way out of ME. Today I think 'Oh' that's interesting' and carry on listening to the news.

I don't really think of me and ME any more. I think more of me and a life that changes. I don't need to squeak my teddy any more and me is just me, not ME.

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